we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
