just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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