So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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