I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
