Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
