just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
