I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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