hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
