Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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