it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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