Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
