He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
