The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
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