Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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