Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I think my vagina is haunted
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
