well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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