Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Randomize
