I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Randomize