Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
