I CAN MOONWALK!
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
