I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
