Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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