You made me cry and you don't even care
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I need moral support for this bender
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize