smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
