Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
