Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
