She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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