Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
