The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
