I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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