So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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