do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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