We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
