I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
