A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I think your dad took our porno
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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