it's too hot outside to masturbate.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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