Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
