I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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