Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
