gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize