Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Randomize
