dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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