He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
