he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
