shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize