I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
