32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
