i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
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