Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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