Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
