does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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