Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
